EmPtinESs...

Emptiness...."kosong".....it is how i am feeling right now. This always happened to me when i read her blog. Why this is happening to me? Its not that i am against her will to write telling the whole world that she is not feeling well. Its just that every time she publish about her "unknown sickness" it made me nervous and scare that i am going to loose her. I am not entitle to hold her backs on her expression and stressing her opinion but please bare in mind that sometime sharing is "believing". You kept telling me not to worry about you but you kept publishing "frightening post" for people and me to read.

It would be nice if you can share the happy moment with family and friends or share anything that is not related to your health which i am not against it but i think you know where this is going. I can control my senses but when people who have read your post and asking me questions than my sense is going hay wired. Sometimes i handled it well enough but sometimes a strong man even cries when it comes to love especially their loved ones. I hope you understand what i am trying to do here. I am not pushing you away nor i am mad at you with your post. If i have offended your feelings please forgive me and it was not intentionally.

Loosing a friend is sadness...
Loosing a lover is unbareable..
but
Loosing a family that you love your entire life..well there is no words to describe those feelings...

i am who i am. my words can be harsh at times but that is just who i am.